nothing more, nothing less

The Views Expressed By Joe Are Not Necessarily the Views of Caitlin.

Joe — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 20:05:18 +0000

Caitlin = Love

Joe = Hate

Now I Understand “Hello Kitty.”

Joe — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 19:44:04 +0000

For years I’ve told people to stay the fuck away from fish, as it’s full of mercury (and many shellfish are full of lead). But they just sigh and roll their eyes, because I’m “crazy,” and everyone knows sushi is soooo healthy. (Oh, and you can get tapeworms from it … http://www.cfsan.fda.gov/~mow/chap26.html).

Anyway, now I understand why Japanese popular culture is dominated by infantile images and retarded sexuality: It’s not because of a reactionary response to the military society that lead to their destruction in WWII (by atomic weapons no less). No, the obvious and much simpler answer is that mercury poisoning has made them retarded.

You’re welcome.

“Tee hee hee. Wait, why me laugh?”

January 23, 2008

High Mercury Levels Are Found in Tuna Sushi

By MARIAN BURROS

Recent laboratory tests found so much mercury in tuna sushi from 20 Manhattan stores and restaurants that at most of them, a regular diet of six pieces a week would exceed the levels considered acceptable by the Environmental Protection Agency.Sushi from 5 of the 20 places had mercury levels so high that the Food and Drug Administration could take legal action to remove the fish from the market. The sushi was bought by The New York Times in October.“No one should eat a meal of tuna with mercury levels like those found in the restaurant samples more than about once every three weeks,” said Dr. Michael Gochfeld, professor of environmental and occupational medicine at the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in Piscataway, N.J.Dr. Gochfeld analyzed the sushi for The Times with Dr. Joanna Burger, professor of life sciences at Rutgers University. He is a former chairman of the New Jersey Mercury Task Force and also treats patients with mercury poisoning.The owner of a restaurant whose tuna sushi had particularly high mercury concentrations said he was shocked by the findings. “I’m startled by this,” said the owner, Drew Nieporent, a managing partner of Nobu Next Door. “Anything that might endanger any customer of ours, we’d be inclined to take off the menu immediately and get to the bottom of it.” Although the samples were gathered in New York City, experts believe similar results would be observed elsewhere.“Mercury levels in bluefin are likely to be very high regardless of location,” said Tim Fitzgerald, a marine scientist for Environmental Defense, an advocacy group that works to protect the environment and improve human health.Most of the restaurants in the survey said the tuna The Times had sampled was bluefin.(Ironically, the good news for the brain-damaged sushi-warriors is that they’ve eaten the bluefin into near-extinction … as well as the “Chilean Sea Bass” and really, hell, everything else. Soon they’ll be harpooning vacationing swimmers off of the beaches of Thailand … which is absurd, because nets are not only more humane, they’re more efficient. You can catch a dozen German tourists in one net. You’d have to be ridiculously lucky to harpoon two at once. ) In 2004 the Food and Drug Administration joined with the Environmental Protection Agency to warn women who might become pregnant and children to limit their consumption of certain varieties of canned tuna because the mercury it contained might damage the developing nervous system. Fresh tuna was not included in the advisory. Most of the tuna sushi in the Times samples contained far more mercury than is typically found in canned tuna.Over the past several years, studies have suggested that mercury may also cause health problems for adults, including an increased risk of cardiovascular disease and neurological symptoms.Dr. P. Michael Bolger, a toxicologist who is head of the chemical hazard assessment team at the Food and Drug Administration, did not comment on the findings in the Times sample but said the agency was reviewing its seafood mercury warnings. Because it has been four years since the advisory was issued, Dr. Bolger said, “we have had a study under way to take a fresh look at it.”No government agency regularly tests seafood for mercury.Tuna samples from the Manhattan restaurants Nobu Next Door, Sushi Seki, Sushi of Gari and Blue Ribbon Sushi and the food store Gourmet Garage all had mercury above one part per million, the “action level” at which the F.D.A. can take food off the market. (The F.D.A. has rarely, if ever, taken any tuna off the market.) The highest mercury concentration, 1.4 parts per million, was found in tuna from Blue Ribbon Sushi. The lowest, 0.10, was bought at Fairway.When told of the newspaper’s findings, Andy Arons, an owner of Gourmet Garage, said: “We’ll look for lower-level-mercury fish. Maybe we won’t sell tuna sushi for a while, until we get to the bottom of this.” Mr. Arons said his stores stocked yellowfin, albacore and bluefin tuna, depending on the available quality and the price.At Blue Ribbon Sushi, Eric Bromberg, an owner, said he was aware that bluefin tuna had higher mercury concentrations. For that reason, Mr. Bromberg said, the restaurant typically told parents with small children not to let them eat “more than one or two pieces.”Koji Oneda, a spokesman for Sushi Seki, said the restaurant would talk to its fish supplier about the issue. A manager at Sushi of Gari, Tomi Tomono, said it warned pregnant women and regular customers who “love to eat tuna” about mercury levels. Mr. Tomono also said the restaurant would put warning labels on the menu “very soon.”Scientists who performed the analysis for The Times ran the tests several times to be sure there was no mistake in the levels of methylmercury, the form of mercury found in fish tied to health problems.The work was done at the Environmental and Occupational Health Sciences Institute, in Piscataway, a partnership between Rutgers and the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School.Six pieces of sushi from most of the restaurants and stores would contain more than 49 micrograms of mercury. That is the amount the Environmental Protection Agency deems acceptable for weekly consumption over a period of several months by an adult of average weight, which the agency defines as 154 pounds. People weighing less are advised to consume even less mercury. The weight of the fish in the tuna pieces sampled by The Times were 0.18 ounces to 1.26 ounces.In general, tuna sushi from food stores was much lower in mercury. These findings reinforce results in other studies showing that more expensive tuna usually contains more mercury because it is more likely to come from a larger species, which accumulates mercury from the fish it eats. Mercury enters the environment as an industrial pollutant.In the Times survey, 10 of the 13 restaurants said at least one of the two tuna samples bought was bluefin. (It is hard for anyone but experts to tell whether a piece of tuna sushi is bluefin by looking at it.)By contrast, other species, like yellowfin and albacore, generally have much less mercury. Several of the stores in the Times sample said the tuna in their sushi was yellowfin.“It is very likely bluefin will be included in next year’s testing,” Dr. Bolger of the F.D.A. said. “A couple of months ago F.D.A. became aware of bluefin tuna as a species Americans are eating.”A number of studies have found high blood mercury levels in people eating a diet rich in seafood. According to a 2007 survey by the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene, the average level of mercury in New Yorkers’ blood is three times higher than the national average. The report found especially high levels among Asian New Yorkers, especially foreign-born Chinese, and people with high incomes. The report noted that Asians tend to eat more seafood, and it speculated that wealthier people favored fish, like swordfish and bluefin tuna, that happen to have higher mercury levels.The city has warned women who are pregnant or

What the hell happened to cousin eddie?

Joe — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 18:08:09 +0000

You may remember Randy Quaid from his delightful portrayal of Cousin Eddie in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. If not, your family clearly doesn’t have the tradition of watching this film EVERY Christmas that mine has. It’s not even so much funny anymore (and I’m not even sure it ever was) as it is an opportunity to prove to one another that we know each and every line of the entire movie.

For instance, it wouldn’t be out of the ordinary to hear one of my family members say, “Merry Christmas. Shitter was full,” while seated by the yule log. Or the ever popular, “Every time Kathrine revved up the microwave, I’d piss my pants and forget who I was for an hour or so.”

That’s just how we roll.

So as a result of that effing movie, I have had this unchanged image in my mind of R. Quaid for years.

But in the words of Robert Frost, “Nothing gold can stay.”

Whaaa? Cousin Eddie in a Man Fur?! NO!

It’s like, 10% mountain man, 40% 1930′s mobster, 45% Father Christmas, 5% Sharon Stone, 0% irony.

The shitter is calling, Randy. Come back to us…

Another Successful Bring-Your-Dog-To-Work Day draws to a close.

Joe — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:50:36 +0000

He smells.

He sheds.

He farts.

He shreds TPS reports.

But he’s the best assistant I’ve ever had.

From Hilary, via the Stranger Slog. And 100% Creepy.

Joe — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 00:18:50 +0000

This is an actual ad from a 1976 issue of Tiger Beat.

Take a listen to the song that has been in my head for 3 months.

Joe — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 18:16:38 +0000

The ending credits to the video game “Portal.”

Listen.

Then try to get it out of your head.

I think you will find it quite impossible, my friends.

Quite impossible indeed.

David Lynch Gets It (But Is Still Insane)

Joe — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 06:37:29 +0000

OMG! No. Freaking. Way.

Joe — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 06:13:31 +0000

Study: False statements preceded war

“Also, the moon is not made of cheese, up is not down, and, though we have yet to conclude that particular study, signs indicate that the sun has literally failed to shine out of anyone’s asshole.” — CPI Report

By DOUGLASS K. DANIEL, Associated Press Writer

A study by two nonprofit journalism organizations found that President Bush and top administration officials issued hundreds of false statements about the national security threat from Iraq in the two years following the 2001 terrorist attacks.

The study concluded that the statements “were part of an orchestrated campaign that effectively galvanized public opinion and, in the process, led the nation to war under decidedly false pretenses.”

The study was posted Tuesday on the Web site of the Center for Public Integrity, which worked with the Fund for Independence in Journalism.

White House spokesman Scott Stanzel did not comment on the merits of the study Tuesday night but reiterated the administration’s position that the world community viewed Iraq’s leader, Saddam Hussein, as a threat.

“The actions taken in 2003 were based on the collective judgment of intelligence agencies around the world,” Stanzel said.

The study counted 935 false statements in the two-year period. It found that in speeches, briefings, interviews and other venues, Bush and administration officials stated unequivocally on at least 532 occasions that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction or was trying to produce or obtain them or had links to al-Qaida or both.

“It is now beyond dispute that Iraq did not possess any weapons of mass destruction or have meaningful ties to al-Qaida,” according to Charles Lewis and Mark Reading-Smith of the Fund for Independence in Journalism staff members, writing an overview of the study. “In short, the Bush administration led the nation to war on the basis of erroneous information that it methodically propagated and that culminated in military action against Iraq on March 19, 2003.”

Named in the study along with Bush were top officials of the administration during the period studied: Vice President Dick Cheney, national security adviser Condoleezza Rice, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld, Secretary of State Colin Powell, Deputy Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz and White House press secretaries Ari Fleischer and Scott McClellan.

Bush led with 259 false statements, 231 about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and 28 about Iraq’s links to al-Qaida, the study found. That was second only to Powell’s 244 false statements about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and 10 about Iraq and al-Qaida.

The center said the study was based on a database created with public statements over the two years beginning on Sept. 11, 2001, and information from more than 25 government reports, books, articles, speeches and interviews.

“The cumulative effect of these false statements — amplified by thousands of news stories and broadcasts — was massive, with the media coverage creating an almost impenetrable din for several critical months in the run-up to war,” the study concluded.

“Some journalists — indeed, even some entire news organizations — have since acknowledged that their coverage during those prewar months was far too deferential and uncritical. These mea culpas notwithstanding, much of the wall-to-wall media coverage provided additional, ‘independent’ validation of the Bush administration’s false statements about Iraq,” it said, adding, “Also, the moon is not made of cheese, up is not down, and, though we have yet to conclude that particular study, signs indicate that the sun literally has failed to shine out of anyone’s asshole.”

___

On the Net:

Center For Public Integrity: http://www.publicintegrity.org/default.aspx

R.I.P., Heath Ledger

Joe — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 22:35:24 +0000

I cannot believe that you were outlived by Amy Winehouse.

So sad.

Oh Amy…

Joe — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 20:04:51 +0000